Assalamualaikum. 

Mencuba sesuatu yang baru. Kisah benar. 

Kau saudaraku

Wahai teman,

Aku juga punya hati,

Aku juga punya perasaan,

Aku juga punya harga diri,

Aku juga manusia,

Sama seperti kau.

Tapi kau bilang,

Kesombongan sebati padaku,

Kau bilang,

Jahil seperti kaum Quraish,

Kau bilang,

Aku belajar bahasa Yahudi.

Kata nista terpalit di mukamu,

Menuduh tanpa dalil,

Bengis, lantang sungguh kau,

Melemparkan kata-kata,

Aku terpana saat mendengar,

Bisikmu menelusuri masuk 

ke hatiku,

Alangkah kolotnya kau,

Lidahku kelu,

Badanku kaku,

Hatiku pilu,

Hirisanmu tak akan hilang

Selamanya.

Inginku katakan padamu,

Salahkah aku kerana mencintai ilmu?

Salahkah aku kerana belajar bahasa itu?

Salahkah aku menjalankan tanggungjawabku?

Katakan kesalahanku padamu.

Jikalau begitu,

Biarlah, biarlah, biarlah,

Melayu mundur, kosong bagai padang terkukur,

Dimalukan di tanah sendiri,

Tiada spesifikasi selain kau,

Katakan aku belajar bahasa Yahudi.

Tapi ingatlah,

Tika keturunanmu lahir nanti,

Kau pasti mengerti,

Bahawa aku hanya mencurahkan

sedikit tenaga,

Bukan untukku, tapi untukmu jua,

Wahai  saudaraku.. 

p/s: Tak salah kalau belajar, tak kiralah bahasa apa pun. Cuma belajar bahasa bukan ikut budaya mereka pun.  Nabi tidak melarang umatnya belajar inikan kita.?

Maaf kepada sesiapa yang terasa. Hanya meluahkan isi hati.  Peace No War. :)

Assalamualaikum. Life is great. Appreciate it. :)

Confusing words that you missed in English class. Syllable. Word by word. 

You might say - Wire aircon no on? 

You might mean - Why air-cond. not on? 

Meaning:  Air - conditioner is not working.? (Kenapa penghawa dingin tak berfungsi ?  )

You might say - Could care less

You always mean - Couldn't care less

Meaning : Don't really care ( Tak berapa kisah ) 

You might say : Less

You might mean : Fewer 

Meaning : Not much , little ( sikit ) 

You never mean : Hone in

You always mean : Home in

Meaning: Aim at something  and move straight 

You might say - Bring ( bawa ) 

You always mean - Take ( ambil ) 

You almost never mean : Different than

You almost always mean : Different from

Meaning : (Than) eg. My mother's cooking is better than her. ( masakan lebih baik ) 

                (From) eg. My mother's cooking is different from her. (masakan berbeza ) 

                                                                          

You might say: Cuba try (Kalau translate jadi .. ) 

You might mean: Have a try or just try.

Meaning : Cuba = try + try = try try? ( Cuba cuba ) 

You almost never mean: Beg the question

You almost always mean : Raise the question

Meaning : "begging" is like making a circular argument

You might say: More than

You can also say : Over

You might say : All of 

You probably mean : All

Meaning : Drop the of

You almost never mean : Supposably ( conceivably ) 

You almost always mean : Supposedly (sepatutnya )

                                                                  

You might say: What? ( Apa )

You should say: Pardon? 

You always say: Go-way!

You mean: Go away! (Pergi ) 

                                                                  

You almost never mean: Sayed ( macam panggil nama orang dah )

You almost always mean : Say it ( cakap ) 

You might say: Toilet

You can also say : Ladies, Gents, Restroom, Washroom

You always say: Bubye

You always mean : Bye-bye

:) That's all. -Reader's Digest & me. 

Assalamualaikum.

Segmen terakhir dari abang Ben Ashaari. Sebab tu join. :) Let's give it a try.

Assalamualaikum. 

Lately. I have been so depressed. Just too many problems to solve in a day. Yeah. With tons of assignments and fights. I just hate it.  Upcoming project: English Language Society. Language Camp and etc. 

I just don't know what to say. * speechless. 

But firstly. I would like to say that. I'M TERRIBLY SORRY TO THESE NAMES BELOW:

1. Nor Shakeerah binti Abedu Rashid
2. Nuruljannah Nabihah binti Mohd. Rodzi
3. Nur Nashrah binti Mohd. Zainol
4. Nur Nezanna binti Mohamed
5. Hazzmira Izzuraini binti Mat Hassim
6. Nur Fatihah binti Abdul Aziz
7. Muhammad Hazwan bin Muhd Hashim

only hazwan was not here. 

I hope we could forgive and forget although it may be scar in our hearts forever. * Undeniable.

Everything that I did was not to make you guys hurt. However, I did not succeed. I HURT YOU GUYS.

I'm terribly sorry. *felt ashamed of myself.  Pity.  Isolated me.

I felt so guilty that I made some of them cried. It was too sincere. I had not seen that for a long long time.

I questioned myself. "How could I do this to my friends? They helped me a lot. They make me laugh, make me aches, make me smile. Hear my annoying cries. Listen to this fella.? Knowing lousy jokes and stories. They bear with me for the past semester and Seriously. No one had ever stand with me." * disappointed.

Well, I just don't know why? Remembering my past. 

They had even made a group of people hating me. Aww. Terrific. See how evil human can be? 

Judging other people by its cover and listening to the bad gossips. Saying that I was weird. 

" Hey, weirdo.!" This weirdo you were talking about, was  far far far away from you. Truthfully. I AM GLAD. 

A day trip to Padang Besar & Kuala Perlis driving Exora. Seriously. It was fun. Fun. Fun enough. You guys made the day.

It was mesmerized here. My heart and in my memories. 

Shall I tell you? *fluttering. Uhm.

During those days. I felt guilty every time when I see you. Please understand me. I had to do that.

I never thought that it will be so bad and difficult. Oh, God. Every time when I am making a terrible mistake. You show me the way. I guess. I just can't afford to make any bad things. *nah, too bad. *lol.

Back to the story.

That lunch. You grabbed me by my arms. Saying that you were sorry. I was quite err. shocked. You stood in front of me. Not letting me go out of your sight. Not having another day without friendship with me. You're sweet. I wish I can be you. :)

All of us. With the windy wind except Mira. :D

I'm not able to see you cry. Do you know?

Please. Please. Please. Don't cry in front of me. Unless you had to. :)

That evening, you cried in front of me.

I was quite touched although my heart ached. Hard-headed. Maybe egoism overwhelmed me. 

Nobody in my life before, cry for me. Cry for losing me. Cry when the gang is not complete. *always left behind. (except my mother ) 

I'm sorry. I should not have done that. I was quite shocked when I heard you guys talked back behind me whereas I was going to apologized for my mistakes.

I was : What??! I never said about them anything! *ergh!

Yes, I cried that night too. 

So, it's fair. We cried. Together. 

Forgive may not be easy. But it is worthwhile. At least, I think so. Do you? 

p/s: You in this story are them. 

Assalamualaikum. 

"I was born when you kissed me.  I lived a few weeks while you loved me. I died when you left me. I wish I am still alive just to be with you."

I'm sorry for not being perfect.

Thx for everything.

Assalamualaikum. 

Okey. Satu lagi contest. Kena buat ucapan atau karangan untuk ibu kerana melahirkan anda. 

I joined this as I felt sorry to myself for sometimes did not appreciate the one who loves me especially my mum.

Let's begin. :) This is my essay of short story.

     Dear Mum.

It took me a lot of time to think what to write about until lately. I was so far from you studying here in Perlis. Every minute of this speech making me realise that I miss you. I found courage to tell you things that I had not tell you ever before. Firstly. I would like to beg you although you might say just only ask. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not appreciating you all these time. I  remembered the moment where we had the biggest fight ever.  My legs were trembling that I can't hardly stand. How rude am I to you. For following my rebellious instinct to do everything that I think was right. Friends said " Remaja, biasa lah. " Narrow-minded and childish the other side of me which only you knew me well. Therefore, thank you shall I say to you. For giving born to me to live with you. For taking care of me. Teaching me. Couching me. Telling me things that I should know. For showing me which is right and which is wrong. For having a fight with me everyday. I love your opinions as they sound right. Trigger me to think hard, " Am i doing the right thing? " . Sometimes, I even write in a paper to tell you how much I hate you. How harsh I told you how much I do not need you in my life. THAT WAS A LIE. I wrote them just to make you upset. 

There were times where I do not trust you but I trusted my friends more as I lived in the hostel with them. I felt closer and safer with them that I poured every love to them but not you. Until, I learnt my lesson. You will still be the first in my heart although you always said that I love dad better than you. Actually I love you both. BOTH. BOTH. BOTH. I would sacrifice everything that I have just to make you happy. I would say stupid things just to make you smile. I miss your hugs and kisses. I asked you to kiss me but instead. You told me that I stinks . Ergh. Well, you were right. I had not a bath yet that morning. *LOL. But you kissed my brother. I was so jealous that I took the bath right away.! How childish I was.! I always say hurtful things to you. Not that I do not love you. But I do not know how to express them to you. I never cry in front of you when watching a very touchable movie with you cause I do not want you to think that I was weak. I was emotional. I was sensitive. I want to have a good impression in your eyes so that I could protect you. Although they were times where those uneducated yet foolish people kept on coming and hurt you, I was not there. I'm sorry. I studied hard so that I could be a Medic student. However, you did not want me to be that. I do not know about it until dad told me about it  last year. You just want me to spend the time with you. If I be a doctor, I would not have much time to fight with you again. *LOL. That was my main reason to be in this TESL programme. To become a lecturer as you admired them much. I have grown up so much that we rarely have fights anymore. Remember you asked me to talk with you or have a fight with you? And I asked for what? To my surprise, you said YOU MISSED ME. The tears welled in my eyes. I was so touched. Yes. But still. I won't cry in front you, mum.  Now, we do not fight anymore but we have all the evenings to ourselves sharing things among us and watch the sunset together every time when I was at home. However, I have the new trend. I will sulk every time I asked things that I did not get from you. I guess. I did not still grow up yet. 

Still want your attention! :)

Saying thank you will never be enough. But still. This is the best I can do. Thank you mother. Without you, this essay of you will never exist neither am I. 


I tag: Arsyad
         Hazwan
         Teha


Further inquiries of this contest : Ayurashidah 
Dateline: 25 Feb. 2011

Assalamualaikum. Life is great. Appreciate it. :)

" I'm hoping for a sunshine behind these cloudy clouds." 

Have you ever thought of that before? 

Sometimes. Feel very depressive or maybe repugnant. 

About our own life.?

Recently in Melaka. A form 5 student had committed suicide in her own school after escaping her Chemistry class. She was a bright student at her school.Read more.

No one ever thought that she would be intended to do that. 

Well, to my opinion, she maybe felt despondent thus took her own life. 

Another precious loss to our country. Malaysia had lost another citizen. 

I'm touched by people around me these few days. 

I met someone whom I did not see for a few years. Auntie Fauzi.

Being hugged and kissed by her not forgetting grandmother of my teacher too. :) She was really being nice. 

Oh. Right now. I'm missing my first teacher. Mrs. Tan. Baba-nyonya. 

I wish I could hug her right now and tell her about how much I miss her. 

My lecturer gave us precious advices about the world.

World is too big and there are so much knowledge to discover.

You may not know everything but at least you know something. 

Here, ( IPG ) is the most suitable place to improve yourself to become somebody.

Here, we ( lecturers ) would want you to become somebody out there.

You go out there and be your very best to serve. 

Seriously. Okey. Why is he giving advices about these during lessons? 

So, people out there!

Open your mind. 

That was our Social Studies class lesson.

I really enjoy them much cause  you will know about the world : everything that happens in your life and your community.

The more you know, the more you know that you don't know.

He had given the talk as most of us. Let me repeat. Most of us.

Enter this education ministry due to our parents wishes.

Seriously. Not only me.?

Yeah. To become a Teslian is not something that I have plan before. It was out of my mind!

In my IPG, there are a lot of people whereby they succeed in their SPM, getting straight A's but they still want to be a teacher.

Clearly to be said, teaching profession which most of people consider as the second-class profession is wrong.

Actually. Teacher is a first-class profession. Have you heard,  " Teacher is the root of education ".

I translated this from the poem written by Usman Awang in B.Melayu, Guru Oh Guru. 

If today is a powerful prime minister
If today is a king ascended the throne
If today is a president of a country
If today is a noble scholar
If today is a trial lawyer wins
If today is a leading writer
If anyone today is an adult;
History was started by a regular teacher
With soft temper-reading teaching writing.

Yes. Undeniable. I totally agreed with this beautifully poem created  by him.

Although at the very first. I once said ( more than once actually ) teaching was my last decision ever.! 

But now. Everything had changed. It's my priority. Someone changed my mind. 

If your parents told you to be a teacher. It's okey.

Be a teacher. After you became a teacher, then be who you want to be.

You can be a teacher and at the same time, you can still be a singer.

You can be a teacher and at the same time, you can still be a lawyer.

You can be a teacher and at the same time, you can still be who you want to be.

If your parents preventing you. You can say.

I already done what you wish for.

Now it's my turn to do what I wish for.

It's my life. 

Any consequences of my actions, I will take responsible of it.

Even though I fail, I already done what I want to be. 

But at least I tried.

Teslians: 

Adibah Noor ( Primary ) 

Ana Raffali (Uitm)

Fynn Jamal ( Lim Kok Wing )

Oh. That was soulful. Too deep meaning till it touched my inner soul.

Making me realise. I can still be who I want to be.  :)
You can still be a teacher but you can still have a degree of lawyer.
Or even coaching other people in the Asia about Tesl.
May be politicians also.  ( story told by my lecturer ).

Being a Teslian is not the border but it is the start of beginning.

We had only contract with government to service for about 5 years. 

After 5 years, we could resign and be the non-employees of government, working at the universities or even overseas.

There are many people out there , once a Teslian but now they are somebody.

p/s: Tesl. It is not a boundary but it is an opportunity.
Kak Fynn komen, dia kata dia ajar English & Literature tak sama ngan TESL. Ops. Sorry, Kak Fynn. :)

Assalamualaikum. 

I'm losing. I'm losing YOU and YOU and YOU.

Did I say something way too honest that made you run and hide like a scared little boy? -Taylor Swift

Did I made you unhappy and moody all the time? 

Did I treat you badly and made you feel insecure?

Did I annoy you and you just need some space? Is it? 

Did and did and did will never be enough, aren't they? 

Oh. Stop regretting and try to hush yourself. 

That was way too much of drama.

Life. Unpredictable. Same goes with humans. Unpredictable feelings.

Feelings which come and go just like touch and go card?

Too cheap yet so low to be called love. 

That is not the definition of love. Love is way too much. 

Nobody can describe love. It's universal.

You can love anyone. OR

You can love somebody at the moment and the next moment you are finding out that you are hating him. 

Isn't that not so delightful?

I thought. We were perfect although with the up and down did not discourage us still.

I cried silently myself to sleep. Hoping you will see me the same way I see you. But.

You will never see that through me, aren't you? 

You can see anything around me but my heart. Ever heard, " once broken, considered sold ?"

 This time. It is not sold. It's broken. And it broke for real. Real enough for no longer having those rainy days.

Dull. Gloom. Dark. I can't even see the sun shining right to me. Pathetic.

I'm lost. Sank in despair. Just like

A general without the army of soldiers

A principal without teachers and students

A captain without the sailors

or maybe..

 An angel without wings to fly back to heaven?

Yes. Love is blind. What should I say more of?

I'm hoping badly for you, I mean, the inner you. 

To come back to me. How I missed those warm days.

 I guess. This is enough. FULLSTOP.