Peace be upon you. :)

I know. I should be taking a nap. 

What a breathtaking.

damn tired. For the past few days I haven't sleep well yet.

But some people don't even know it.

I got lots of stuffs to do. to think about. yet no one to pour with.

I can't contain everything. but still I have no one.

Some silly things get me frustrated easily.

I'm losing myself & my ship.

Still. I have no idea to begin with.

People will say. Yeah, deserve you for leaving him.

Oh. I'll say. Maybe yes and maybe not.

Am I being not patience enough?

emotional and being unprofessional.

Cool.

What should I do.

When people told me to get a life. not to talk too much. not to this and that. for almost everything.

It is quite saddening. coz I can't tell. I can't embraced. I can't do it.

Coz I really.. uhm..  But with all these circumstances. I just don't know. How long this can be.?

I'm being the pushy one. being too sensitive. being this and that.

I've been given too much critics and screwed.

yet. I do not own it. 

Sometimes. I don't feel I own the heart. 

It is such a heart breaking. for trying to hold on till the limits of your breath. 

It's like swimming with a scoop of air and you need air to breathe but you hold on. 

suffocated and drown into the world of your own. 

I might be bang by posting this.

yes. I know.

I need to take the risk.

For now. 

I might need a few fresh air and rest. 

Hopefully.

Peace be upon you. :)

I don't really get it nowadays. 

Where have been the wrongs I made? 

Did I screw up things?

Or did try so hard?

Nah, even the talking won't solved the problem.

No one will ever understand it either.

How should I do it? 

Follow their suggestions? 

I don't think so. That felt like a curse upon me.

Sometimes I do ponder why things didn't turned up to be the way it should be?

Is it a punishment for the sins I did? 

All those stupid things that happened in life, which I screwed.

I lost lots of things, some of them which are precious of mine.

Well, I don't want to lose it any further. 

I really felt so down. so low today. well, actually since yesterday. LOL.

sometimes, things happens. made me reminisce what happens in my life.

where the choices are not mine and I had to. where the choices I regretted.

If I could turn back time, will all of this problem be possible here now?

yeah. I'm talking nonsense.

How can I turn back time??

Someone's being blind right now. And why is that?

Sometimes I wish to just stop trying and tell myself.

Hey, stop it. Well, I just can't, you see.

I can't stop doing things I love and I can't stop being me.

With all the people judging around me. Being paparazzi all the time.

I can't helped myself -for - not - being- happy.

Well, something did.

Only if you hurt me.

I guess. That what happens now.

Totally.